Thursday, July 26, 2007
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Smoking: not.
Reading: … Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (stfu, I am NOT on the bandwagon)
As I crawled into bed with Codie, who was fast asleep, my chest felt tight and I felt as if I were leaving for more than two weeks. It’s so ridiculous how much I felt as if I were losing him as he gripped him tightly. He snored at me as I almost-sobbed for several minutes, and then I kissed his temple and went back to my computers to finish whatever the hell I was doing.
I had to poke him again and again to get him up, and when he finally rose, he was sleepy and not all too pleased at being poked to wake up for several minutes. Hugging him once he was fully conscious, my throat tightened and I teared up, nearly bawling as he wandered back through my bathroom…
The actual good-bye was lingering, but tear-free. I knew both of us were on the brink of it, but we never seem to really cry in front of each other. For myself, I’m not sure if it’s a feeling of happiness that I associate with him, or a lack of courage or selflessness to let myself go like that… I’ve only cried in front of him once, and he in front of me, and we weren’t even facing each other at the time, so I don’t count that. :P We kept going back, kissing again, squeezing each other tightly… I thought we’d never let each other go.
It’s amazing; no matter how much I LOVE going to the beach, I really had thoughts of just… not going. Just staying with Codie. How marvelous would that be? Two weeks, the two of us, and my house. Alone. (Aside from Sam, pfft.)
In any case, I’m on the road, and the internet here sucks. We’re in a shoddy little Ramada, I assume (judging by the soap label), that under ‘major renovations’ which means… we have two microwaves and no toilet-paper holder. >_> STRANGE. Final stopping point for tonight: Shreveport, Louisiana.
We ate at the restaurant of my childhood this afternoon, Mario’s, which is in Dallas. I had all my old dishes, including one of their marvelous strawberry daiquiris, and it was EXACTLY how I remember. Not a thing had changed (except for the location), and I was in absolute bliss. I grinned the whole meal, and my mother kept laughing at me. We had Kailua pie for dessert and all was well. (And I greedily grabbed two handfuls of chocolate mints on the way out, making everyone in our party laugh.)
Trying to get Sims to run on my laptop (my new/renewed obsession), and ended up having to repurchase an expansion I already had, yadda yadda yadda, had problems with EPs at home, had to troubleshoot Codie over the phone (hey! Maybe I have a future in cable customer service over the phone, too!), and I think it’s working now! I need to, unfortunately, uninstall the EP I tried to hard to keep on my laptop off my laptop, but at least it will run? God, I hope.
Keeping myself busy, dreaming of sun and sand and cousins of my favorite kind. Trying not to kill myself missing my Roman. Miss you.
Reading: … Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (stfu, I am NOT on the bandwagon)
As I crawled into bed with Codie, who was fast asleep, my chest felt tight and I felt as if I were leaving for more than two weeks. It’s so ridiculous how much I felt as if I were losing him as he gripped him tightly. He snored at me as I almost-sobbed for several minutes, and then I kissed his temple and went back to my computers to finish whatever the hell I was doing.
I had to poke him again and again to get him up, and when he finally rose, he was sleepy and not all too pleased at being poked to wake up for several minutes. Hugging him once he was fully conscious, my throat tightened and I teared up, nearly bawling as he wandered back through my bathroom…
The actual good-bye was lingering, but tear-free. I knew both of us were on the brink of it, but we never seem to really cry in front of each other. For myself, I’m not sure if it’s a feeling of happiness that I associate with him, or a lack of courage or selflessness to let myself go like that… I’ve only cried in front of him once, and he in front of me, and we weren’t even facing each other at the time, so I don’t count that. :P We kept going back, kissing again, squeezing each other tightly… I thought we’d never let each other go.
It’s amazing; no matter how much I LOVE going to the beach, I really had thoughts of just… not going. Just staying with Codie. How marvelous would that be? Two weeks, the two of us, and my house. Alone. (Aside from Sam, pfft.)
In any case, I’m on the road, and the internet here sucks. We’re in a shoddy little Ramada, I assume (judging by the soap label), that under ‘major renovations’ which means… we have two microwaves and no toilet-paper holder. >_> STRANGE. Final stopping point for tonight: Shreveport, Louisiana.
We ate at the restaurant of my childhood this afternoon, Mario’s, which is in Dallas. I had all my old dishes, including one of their marvelous strawberry daiquiris, and it was EXACTLY how I remember. Not a thing had changed (except for the location), and I was in absolute bliss. I grinned the whole meal, and my mother kept laughing at me. We had Kailua pie for dessert and all was well. (And I greedily grabbed two handfuls of chocolate mints on the way out, making everyone in our party laugh.)
Trying to get Sims to run on my laptop (my new/renewed obsession), and ended up having to repurchase an expansion I already had, yadda yadda yadda, had problems with EPs at home, had to troubleshoot Codie over the phone (hey! Maybe I have a future in cable customer service over the phone, too!), and I think it’s working now! I need to, unfortunately, uninstall the EP I tried to hard to keep on my laptop off my laptop, but at least it will run? God, I hope.
Keeping myself busy, dreaming of sun and sand and cousins of my favorite kind. Trying not to kill myself missing my Roman. Miss you.
// posted by Kate @ 1:17 AM 
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